Wednesday, March 30, 2011

The early days

F and I moved in together over a week ago, and things are getting better every day.  I have been spending every spare moment unpacking, desperate to get the house in some sort of liveable order.  I hate moving down to the core of my being, and it upsets me greatly not to have a home where I feel comfortable and safe.  Therefore, my goal is to have everything put away ASAP.

Overall, it is going well.  Sometimes there are blips though.  I have moments where I become frustrated and overwhelmed and unable to organize for one more minute.  Luckily F has been very helpful in those situations, as he is able to make an assessment and give me direction and motivation.  Last night I was really hoping to get the upstairs finished (two of the extra rooms are mine, while he gets reign of an office downstairs and the garage).  I was unsuccessful, but I finished most of the kitchen instead.  Now it will be much easier to cook, which is always a plus.

Mostly, things just don't feel normal yet.  Not only has my home changed, but our relationship is changing.  None of old rules apply, and we are still working on making the new rules.  Weird things happen.  For example, sometimes after we both have spent the entire day in the house, with me unpacking and him working (he works from home), I find myself desiring to actually spend time connecting with him, despite being "together" for hours.  And when he has to work late into the night and I have to go to bed so I can go to my 8AM job, it's hard not having that.  Who would have thought?  The woman who savors her alone time like coffee ice cream has become all domesticated!  On Saturday night, on the way to meet friends for drinks, I had to stop at Fred Meyer to buy towels.  TOWELS?  On a Saturday night?  Huh?

Anyway, it's good, this whole living together business.  I find small moments to savor instead of blocking out huge chunks of boyfriend time.  It is the best thing in the world when he makes me dinner.  Doing my own activities and then take a quick break for a hug and a kiss and a little chat and then going back to whatever I was doing is great.  And the moments sleeping at night, where we can just be together, are something that I look forward to.  No matter how hectic the day is, even if I have school until late, I know at least I'll see him at the end of it all.